A presumably lubricated Robert Pattinson stumbled his way through a tribute to his 'Water for Elephants' co-star Reese Witherspoon at the MTV Movie Awards on Sunday, flubbing teed-up
punchlines and dropping an epic f**k-bomb that proved too nimble for censors.
Following a short speech by Patrick Dempsey, R.Patz appeared confused when it came time for him to speak about Witherspoon, who was receiving the Generation Award. After some inaudible giggling and a "This is the worst" observation by co-presenter Chelsea Handler, Pattinson began telling about the first time he worked with Witherspoon.
"I don't know if everyone knows, but I did my first movie with you. Called 'Vanity Fair,' and you played my mother. What I later learned though was that you were directly responsible for cutting my part of the movie -- [Reese shakes her head in the audience] -- This is the truth," he said. "Seven years later, we worked together in a movie called 'Water for Elephants.' And this time you played my lover. I didn't cut you out. But I did f*ck you."
Unlike the plethora of other F's flying around the effing show, this one made it past the bleeper. He then carried on with his roast-style jokes, implying that Witherspoon has an affinity for tequila and that she taught him that "it's possible to be 33% lesbian -- not mentioning any names."
"Reese, working with you twice and not getting cut out once was such a special experience but if there's one thing I'll take with me. As you get older, it's not always a bad thing to have sexual chemistry with your mother. Congratulations."
When Witherspoon came to accept her honor, which is the equivalent of a lifetime achievement award, she took a swipe at her co-star's comedy stylings.
"By the way Rob, the punchline to your joke was I played your mother. We had a sex scene. So really you're the best motherf**ker in Hollywood."
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